Bewbstuck

Escape from Spiral Madness
The Sixth Session of Bewbstuck

After having unmasked the murderer at the Promenade, the Kids found themselves confronted by the mysterious Opera Singer, the two forces standing squarely opposed to each other. The Singer’s plan was revealed (rather unfortunately for them considering their RPG blew apart the murderer and the floor) to be to destroy the talks with a bomb. A bomb planted squarely on top of a previously unknown Spiral hiding right under the diplomatic process meant to stamp them out.

The Opera Singer, determined to carry out their mission to destroy the Spirals, engaged in combat with the Kids in an attempt to buy time for the bomb to detonate. As the timer ticked down, the Singer landed several blows against the group, knocking out individuals left and right with mighty blasts. Nevertheless, Will and Brian managed to disarm the bomb with the help of the Prospitian Guard Captain while Elysse and Bird held the Singer at bay.

With the bomb temporarily neutralized, the team finished the fight against the Opera Singer. Bird, in an act of mercy, dealt a nonlethal blow to merely knock out the Singer. Curiousity overtook the group, and in a swift moment the mask of their attacker was removed, revealing….

The Opera Singer was a human! A human girl!

Coming to, and with her secret revealed, the Singer identified herself to Bird. Turning to her friends, Bird and the Singer came clean; they were related. In some strange way, Bird and the Singer were each other’s mother and daughter! The mysterious girl was named Jody Rose, and when questioned explained that she had arrived in this session from her own Sburb session, one inexplicably link to this one by means of a phenomenon called the Scratch. Her friends were stolen from her by alien forces beyond imagination; it was only by the skin of her teeth that Jody had stolen a vessel and by unknown means traveled to their session.

Her mission upon arrival was clear. She would destroy the Spirals that plagued this session as it had hers, all while stopping anyone that got in her way, including the Kids. With the Spirals dispatched, she would use whatever resources were present in this session to free her friends from their kidnapping. When asked why she managed to escape, the only reason Jody could offer was that her friends had reached God-Tier, a mythical power level few manage to achieve in Sburb….

Belligerent Mediary, a party to all of these talks, insisted on taking away Jody to a Dersite prison to be interrogated and put on trial. Not content to allow this to happen, the Kids formed a plan. Brian summoned his loaned Prospitian vessel, instructing it to ram through the walls of the Promenade. Once the walls were breached, the group climbed aboard as BM attempted to stop the escape. As a last ditch effort, the Mediary tossed a grenade into the pit containing the recently defused bomb and made a run for it. The ship barely made it out as a massive explosion obliterated the building.

However, the group hadn’t made it just yet. A pair of Dersite frigates approached, armed to the teeth and bearing down on their vessel. The Kids and Crew headed for battle stations. Brian took the helm along with the Captain, Will made haste towards engineering, Bird took over gunner duty, and Elysse proceeded belowdecks.

The pair of Dersite vessels flanked the ship, blowing holes in the hull. The crew fought valiantly, even as the Captain fell to gunfire. Brian took over piloting, attempting risky maneuvers and ‘punching it’ to escape their foe’s firing range. Will made attempt to improve the engines and give them more power, even as they took continuous damage. Bird blasted away major enemy ship systems, buying the crew time and neutralizing foes. Finally, Elysse discovered a stowaway belowdecks: the Esurient Dilettante! Holding a bomb in her hands and wearing a parachute pack, the Dilettante in her madness tried to cut a deal. If she were allowed to jump offboard, she wouldn’t detonate the bomb.

Elysse didn’t buy this line, and attempt to freeze ED in place with the frozen orb she had collected in Melonmold Crypt. Unfortunately, she missed her throw, sending it sailing through the open airlock. ED cackled and tossed the bomb at Elysse before jumping. In a brave attempt to save the ship, Elysse grabbed the bomb and tossed it at the airlock….

However, the bomb detonated just as it was leaving the ship, blasting a massive hole in the hull and disabling the ship. Thankfully, the Dersite ships that were pursuing them had been destroyed and the ship had escaped LOVAR’s gravitational pull. Nevertheless, the ship itself was wrecked, left drifting through the Medium.

With their vessel ruined and no hope in sight, what will our Kids to next? Find out next time, on Bewbstuck!

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Murder at the Peace Talks
The Fifth Session of Bewbstuck

Arriving at the Land of Veins and Resonance, the group prepared for a set of peace talks aimed at providing both Prospit and Derse with time to investigate a growing problem: the appearance of strange spirals across the Medium.

Arriving at the Promenade, the group was introduced to members of both delegations. From Prospit, they met the Wearied Consulate, the Defensive Overseer, the Inferno Extinguisher, and the Legislation Interpreter. From Derse, they met the Draconian Dignitary, the Fawning Coadjutor, the Tome Coordinator, and the Wound Healer.

After introductions, the group set about engaging in afternoon talks. Both sides argued and spoke harshly against the other, but set about agreeing on sending a team of scientists with a smaller proportion from Prospit, alongside the Heroes, who would serve as guards. Talks were adjourned, and after a rest period and a lengthy dress-up session, the Heroes were prepared for the Promenade.

While there, they met many varied characters from both Prospit and Derse, who had been invited to join the festivities. Of note were the Adversarial Draughstman, the Esurient Dilletante, and the Mendacious Tapper.

Partway through the festivities, a scream shook out through the building. the Wearied Consulate, leader of the Prospitian delegation, was found dead in the smoking parlor! Enlisted to determine the identity of the murderer, the Heroes interrogated the partygoers for information. Will managed through time shenanigans to track down the Dilletante and the Tapper, who were not the murderers but who were working to steal treasure from the building. The group also confronted the Belligerant Mediary, who had been assigned as chief of security for the event. Several others were interviewed, including the suspicious Draconian Dignitary, but eventually all clues pointed to the Draughstman, who had killed the Consulate in order to stop the talks since he believed they were a ruse to allow the Dersites to build up their forces for a siege.

However, before the Draughstman could reveal who had actually set him up with the means to kill the Consulate, he was blown apart by an explosion. Up in the rafters, a mysterious figure emerged… it was the Opera Singer!

What will happen to the talks? What does the Singer want? Why was the murderer destroyed? Tune in next time for more Bewbstuck!

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The Battle of the Belligerent Mediary
The Fourth Session of Bewbstuck

Finally having uncovered the wretched production facility manufacturing the Underlings in Melonmold Crypt, the group proceeded to familiarize themselves with the machines populating the control room of the facility.

The four Heroes manipulated the machines, learning that some machines could be used to improve or diminish the strengths of each Underling, that the Underlings could be programmed to accept orders from certain groups. So what is a group to do? Why, nothing but build their own small army of Underlings!

They initiated the growth of a squad of 8 Underlings, but soon noticed a major problem: An Agent of Derse with a whole team of Ogres and Imps! They proceeded to kill the newly crafted Imps one at a time as they came down the conveyor belt. Setting in the commands for some Ogres, the team went down to the ground floor to settle the score.

A giant battle blew out on the factory floor, with a defensive formation of Underlings pushing into the team’s line. Weapons were swung, blood was spilled, and the Field Agent (named the Belligerent Mediary) brought both Brian and Elysse near to death. While incapacitated, both Elysse and Brian found themselves in strange places; both awoke on Prospit and Derse!

Elysse had an encounter with a young Dersite servant, who pointed Elysse in the direction of the Horrorterrors. Looking out the window into the Void, she conversed with the tentacled creatures, who through meandering riddles, described the unnatural nature of the threats surrounding their Medium. Meanwhile, Brian awoke to a jubilant servant on Prospit, who alerted the White Queen and pointed him in the direction of the clouds of Skaia. There, he experienced visions of grey aliens with horns, of moments from his past on Earth, and of the four Heroes battling on a tremendous structure on the Land of Libraries and Entropy.

At the last second, a mysterious figure named the Opera Singer appeared, wiping out the remaining enemies and scaring off the Mediary. The figure quickly teleported to group out of the Lab, just in time to avoid the tides. Just as mysteriously as they arrived, they left, leaving nothing but a warning to keep out of their way.

Finding themselves back at Melonmold Village, the group received a visitor; a pilot from Prospit named the Audacious Navigator. Bringing news that the Queen had summoned them to an audience with her, the group traveled by Dropship to the Palace. There, she requested them to go on a mission of great importance. That mission was to join a Prospitian delegation in diplomatic talks with Derse. A threat known only as the Spirals was appearing. Massive spirals buried under rock were being uncovered and affecting the realms around them, and a ceasefire was being discussed to give each side time to deal with the threat.

She granted each kid a gift: Elysse received armor and the future location of her true Treasure. Brian was promised the potential of one of the strongest Treasures, instead taking temporary ownership of a hi-speed ship to aid in their quests. Bird received a chest containing her Treasure, which would unleash its parcel once the time was right. Will received the final Treasure, a keyboard Time Machine from his future self. After an awkward interaction, he received the machine and traveled forward in time.

In the future, Will saw a brief and dramatic moment: Massive fleets of ships fighting each other in the depths of space….

What will happen next? How will the peace talks go? Find out next time on Bewbstuck!

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The Exploration of Melonmold Crypt
The Third Session of Bewbstuck

Went through the dungeon, got to the lab, stopped there.

Our heroes, in their perilous and treacherous task, finally penetrated deep into the heart of the forsaken Melonmold Crypt. They dark and musty walls greeted them in silence. However, they rapidly found themselves to be in the company of some rather aggressive foes!

Immediately upon entry, while turning down a corridor, Bird ran smack dab into an Imp patrol that was guarding the halls of the Crypt. They quickly ran into the nearby guardroom, where they alerted 6 other Imps and began a crippling attack against the wholly unprepared heroes. Nevertheless, with a significant amount of teamwork, the group slaughtered the offending Imps and pushed further.

The party made many discoveries while venturing deeper. They uncovered a chapel with a mysterious stone that later was revealed to be a stone of Resurrection! They also uncovered curious spheres in the Morgue and the Crematorium, one of which emitted a great deal of cold wind and the other of which emitted blasts of hot air. One chamber even contained a neglected Imp, trapped in his cage for being a nuisance. Garf soon joined the party under the wary watch of his new allies.

Loaded with treasures and a desire to uncover the source of the Underlings, the party examined a long-abandoned well for answers. Certain that they would find a secret entrance into the Underling base here, they dropped Brian down into the depths below. Lo and behold, Brian bashed down a wall and revealed an entrance into a hi-tech laboratory!

Journeying down, the rest of the group entered into this strange scientific arena. Researching on the computers covering the area, they learned that the Underlings they had been fighting were produced, nay, born here. Determined to learn more and to put a stop to this dastardly activity, the group ascended into the control room, slew a lone Imp, and then set about accessing the machines.

What will happen next time? Will they succeed and shut down this factory from hell? Find out next time on Bewbstuck!

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Attack on Melonmold Village
The Second Session of Bewbstuck

Brian, being the last in bunch to find his transportalizer, ascended one of the many obsidian towers of the Land of Veins and Resonance. After having fixed the elevator, he and Maxsprite reached the penultimate floor of the tower, where he stumbled upon a firefight between and red-marked and blue-marked pair of dummies. With the assistance of his sprite, Brian managed to distract the red-marked dummy, allowing the blue dummy to kill it and abscond. Further exploration of the floor revealed a card key, which allowed Brian up to the top floor.

On the top floor, Brian found himself in the center of a turf war, as blue and red dummies shot at each other all throughout the floor. He attempted to sneak by but ended up causing a ruckus when he fell over near the door he was sneaking to. In an vain attempt to avoid getting shot, Brian sang a song using his ukelele. Instead of uniting the dummies in song, the blue dummies took advantage of the opportunity and killed all of the red dummies before leaving the building.

With the situation resolved, Brian proceeded through the top floor and found his transportalizer. Finally, all four humans (and their gaggle of cohorts) found themselves together on what appeared to be a space station or satellite orbiting Skaia. A computer came online and revealed itself as an AI operating the station. It identified itself as CORSA, otherwise known as the Cloud-Oriented Regulator and Sentient Agent. It answered questions regarding the purpose of the game, while simultaneously pushing our Heroes to choose a Land to explore. Before doing so, the group received ominous messages from mysterious persons on Pesterchum.

Elysse was confronted by fashionistaVictorious once more, who elaborated on the nature of their interaction. Elysse insisted they be friends and share details of their newly-embarked adventures together.

Bird communicated with jealousNecroticist, a hostile and foul-mouthed individual. They had no real desire to help Bird but felt their hand was forced. Bird reacted coolly to the insults, and the two parted with a faint promise to speak together again.

Will dealt with flushedHolograms, a jovial and rather dorky character, who proceeded to share their love for adventure and making holographic art. Barely allowing Will to get a word in, flushedHolograms informed Will that they were meant to share information together and be partners across sessions. Will easily agreed to this proposal.

Finally, Brian interacted with a seemingly even-tempered individual named aetherCastrated. They communicated information suggesting that they and the other mysterious people were aliens. They also communicated their intention to partner with Brian and share in game information.

All of the mysterious people spoke cautiously of the fact that our Heroes were already together tackling their Lands as a team. They also spoke of ‘benefactors’ that were helping them….

Our Heroes chose to journey through the Land of Tides and Radiation. They walked for a while before coming across a village in trouble. Coming up to it, they soon found a Consort Village under attack by Imps! The group dispatched the foes quickly, and communed with the elder of Melonmold Village, an Iguana named Babblewort. Babblewort thanked the group for their help but bemoaned the fact that the source of the Underlings needed to be destroyed. Enlisting the Heroes, Babblewort asked that the Melonmold Crypt be investigated, as it was pinpointed as the source of the attacks.

Along with a guide named Sloop, the group traveled north to the Drowned Canyon, the home of the Crypt. Climbing and crossing the canyon, the group put their skills to the test making their way through the treacherous environment. Finally, everyone reached the entrance of the Crypt, a large door with a mighty face on it. As soon as they approached the door, it came to life, speaking jovially to the party. Below the face was carved the words “the password is arid”.

After a lengthy and confusing conversation, it was revealed that the way to make the door open was to make it say the word ‘arid’. It soon swung open, and as the party entered the atrium behind it, they were locked in and attacked by several Imps and one mighty Ogre! An epic fight proceeded, with a great deal of teamwork and bravery taking the day back from the Underling menace. Even Sloop, a young and eager Iguana, managed to dispatch an Imp on his own!

Now the party prepares to penetrate into the heart of the Crypt, to find the source of the Underling evil permeating from it! Will they find what they’re looking for? Or will they join the corpses held within? Find out next time, on Bewbstuck!

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Journey's Beginning
The First Session of Bewbstuck

On July 10th, a quartet of teenagers gathered from across America to play a new game titled Sburb. Brian, Elysse, Will, and. Bird began their days like any other, anticipating the arrival of an illustrious pair of discs…

Brian, wary of being cornered into a long lecture by his Mum, made a successful attempt to sneak through the house towards the mailbox. Using his skills, Brian avoided a Strife or a long winded conversation with his Guardian.

Elysse sought to procure her discs from the mail, but found that her Pop had already claimed it. Attempting to diplomatically take posession of her package, she played a CD of Aerosmith’s Greatest Hits. This was to no avail however, resulted in a rather one-sided Strife. However, some successful Chumming managed to convince Pop to instead allow Elysse to do some chores to gain access to the game.

Will took ended up Strifing with his Dad more directly, resulting in Will being completely obliterated by a significantly more powerful adult male. Nevertheless, Will’s show of bravery resulted in his acquisition of his game discs.

Finally, Bird found herself in a high stakes fight with her Mom after failing to gather the discs from thr mailbox. Mom was unforgiving, blowing several craters into the nearby street. However, a well-aimed blow with her shovel left Mom with a concussion and Bird with a barely-won victory.

The group began installing their games, and in sequence connected to each othe, producing pairs of clients and servers. Brian became Elysse’s server, Elysse became Will’s server, Will became Bird’s server, and Bird became Brian’s server. The four set out their machines in (surprisingly neat) order, and began assisting each other in the entry process in order.

Brian was the first to open his Cruxtruder, and under pressure from the mysterious timer, Brian ran around creating his entry item. Almost as an afterthought, Brian prototyped his sprite, tossing an old marionette named Max into the flickering orb. After a hurried process, Brian’s entry item appeared: a beating heart on a podium, surrounded by empty flower pots. After some intense puzzling, Brian stabbed the heart. The blood poured down, watering the flower pots and growing the seeds within. In this way, Brian narrowly escaped a metoer barrelling right towards his house.

In a flash of energy, Brian found himself transported to the Land of Veins and Resonance, a massive dark cityscape covered in blood vessels and crystal lattices. A run in with rival gun-toting puppet gangs caused his house, which was held up on a hovercar, to crash violently into the ground.

A similar instanxe occured to Elysse, who took the experience she had helping Brian to quickly escape into the game. Elysse prototyped her sprite with a figurine of Rock Lee, and then proceeded to create her entry item, a mirror. After a few attempts to affect the mirror, she shattered it, resulting in her Entry.

She was transported to the Land of Echoes and Entanglement, a hellish land of fire and desert, both hemispheres of which mirrored one another. Her house proceedeed to sail across a lava ocean on a metal boat, but problems with the heat caused her house to catch on fire and the boat to accelerate, catapaulting it towards land.

Will moved quickly, attempting to prototype his sprite with a KFC bucket. For some arbitrary reason, the sprite rejected this option, and through a series of contrived coincidences, both a frozen coyote corpse and a frozen guinea pig corspe were thrown into the sprite.

Moving on, Will produced his entry item, which was a ticking timebomb. After managing to diffuse the bomb, Will was transported to the Land of Libraries and Entropy, a forested world covered in libraries, fragmented in time. A ride down a pair of railroad tracks resulted in a devastating crash thar split Will’s house in two.

Last but not least, Bird ran through the entry steps quickly, prototyping her sprite with a figurine of a frog playing billiards. She produced a curious entry item: a bird struggling to open a cage, next to a large padlock. After fiddling with the item for a few moments, she locked the bird inside the cage, activating her Entry.

Bird was whisked away to the Land of Tides and Radiation, a watery planet with tremendous tides and radioactive reefs. Her house, afloat on a boat, braved one of those tremendous tides to land squarely on an island.

After several moments of astonishment and frantic texting, the four kids spent time with their new sprite guides and began exploring their realms.

Brian found himself at the foot of an obsidian skyscraper, which be promptly began exploring. He rapidly solved a mechanical problem with the building’s elevator, allowing him to ascend the building.

Elysse, whilst exploring, fell through a hole in the earth and landed in a wolf den. She madw a perilious escape, and after outwitting the beasts, trapped them by knocking over a barrel of water and catching them in thick mud. Taking pity on ths creatures, she attempted to free them. Rocksprite attempted to help as well, inadvertently prototyping himself with a wolf after trying to pull it out of the muck. Elysse proceeded inside a house where she met a Crocodile named Grokberry, who claimed to be a wizard. With a consort and two wolves in tow, she proceeded further, finding a teleporter with a mysterious destination…

Will traveled from his home, stumbling upon a library. His explorations revealed a set of of rooms locked by doors that required answers to complex riddles. He conquered three doors, each with questions concerning time. Finally, he found himself in a chamber with q holographic representation of the Medium, with a poem testing his wits. The poem asked him to make a choice concerning death, concerning his friends and the paths laid before them. After choosing, he entered a teleporter room, leading somewhere unknown…

Bird found herself traveling through a reef, uncovering a mysterious stone building. Entering the building, she found herself trapped in a maze. By using pumps to flood and drain the maze, she was able to navigate climb ladders that were just out of reach. Those chambers contained crystal keys which she used after escaping the maze to unlock a teleporter of her own…

What will happen to our Heroes next time? Tune in again and find out!

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